Friday, July 25, 2008

A Victim of Circumstances?

While attending one of the parties that my Filipino group organized 6 months ago, I met another young Filipino lady who is also married to an American guy. We seemed to click with each other after our first conversation. Maybe because she professed to be a Christian. She and her husband started visiting us in our house. We would just eat, talk and have fun. As time went by, I began to notice the negative tone in her language. She would bad-mouth some of the people that I know in our Filipino group. It progressed to speaking ill about her own siblings- of how she was mistreated by all of them. She would use the most disgusting word to describe her very bad idea of these people. She would also complain just about anything- how she felt like being overworked in her job, her unplanned pregnancy, having a very irresponsible step-son and the list can go on. She blamed all these circumstances for her all-time depressed mood. Until one day, I couldn't take it anymore. I literally told her to stop! We had an emotional conversation and I thought I lost her for good. We didn't talk for a couple months. Recently, we bumped into each other at a common friend's house. She hugged me. She smiled. Her aura has drastically changed. I saw happiness painted on her eyes. She said, "thank you for being my friend."

Many women today think that if their circumstances were different, they would be different. They feel that if their upbringing, their environment, the people around them were different, they would be more patient, more loving, more content and easier to live with. But this is not true. If it is, then we are victims. If we are victims, then we are not responsible- we can't help the way we are. But we are responsible! Responsible for our own responses to the circumstances. The truth is our circumstances do not make us what we are. They merely reveal what we are. Thank God for giving us these circumstances for by them we will know how we need to be changed by His grace.

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